10 Easy Ways to Create Sacred Space for Healing and Support During the First Forty Days

The following guidelines represent an intention to create a Sacred Space for the new Mother to heal, to protect the newborn’s immune and nervous systems, promote a healthy breastfeeding relationship and allow for the new family to bond without outside expectations or projections. I encourage each woman to do as much as she can, or as little as she wants, of these traditions. They are meant as a guide, not a prison sentence. When women are given the permission and love to slow down and make this massive transition in peace, their inward and outward healing skyrockets. There is an old Indian saying that “the first 40 days of life will impact the next 40 years of life”. The more healing intention that you bring to your life now, the better your physical/ mental/ emotional health will be later on.

  1. Keep visits with friends and family to a 20-30 minute window (ideally).
  2. Be very specific about what visitors will be soothing to the Mother and NOT add any drama, stress or overexcitement. This is YOUR time not theirs. Too much stimulation, whether good or bad, reaps havoc on an already overtaxed nervous system.
  3. Only allow the mama and daddy to hold baby or very close family and friends. And IF others hold baby, they MUST wash their hands with hot soapy water beforehand. I also recommend putting a swaddle blanket between baby and visitor or better yet, have them change their shirt to a new clean t-shirt. I have clients who bought a big stack of plain white t-shirts from Costco for visitors. That way it’s not personal, it’s just the house rule. You have no idea where people have been before they enter your home. This is not the time to people please.
  4. Keep baby within 9 feet of mama at all times so that their auric fields can begin to slowly and safely separate from one another (optional). Just remember Mama & Baby have been one and it takes time for a natural separation to occur.
  5. Ask visitors to take their shoes off. Keep house as clean as possible. If visitors have toddlers or kids (especially if in school) ask them to bring children a few weeks later or ideally after the 6 weeks end. No offense, but school-aged kids carry a lot of germs. If wintertime, put off visitors as long as you can, blame it on your doctor 🙂
  6. Keep rooms dimly lit.
  7. Music soothing and low.
  8. No loud or violent TV shows. Keep news watching to a minimum (most of it is fear-based). Better yet, no TV.
  9. Warming foods and drinks, no cold or raw foods. Try and eat every 2-3 hours. And always make sure to hydrate fully when breastfeeding baby.
  10. Ask for Help- friends and family want to help so take advantage of that and make your life easier so that you can concentrate on what’s most important.

BONUS: Get a bouncer!

Skin to skin bonding is one of the best ways to bond with your little one and also decrease the symptoms of postpartum depression. But sometimes, we need “me” time. Bouncers are a great way to create some sacred space during those sweet postpartum days. Bouncers give your little one a safe space to rest when they can’t be in your arms. So whether you need to rest, read a book, take a shower, or cook yourself a nice meal, you can rest easy knowing your baby is safe and secure and still nearby for bonding.

Happy Healthy Mama = Happy Healthy Family.

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McLean is a Postpartum Doula, Lactation Educator Counselor, Prenatal & Postnatal Yoga/ Pilates/ Meditation Teacher, Nutritionist, Death Doula, Reiki Practitioner, Crystal Worker, Motherhood Coach and Podcast Host living in Los Angeles.

After the birth of her first daughter, McLean quickly realized that there was a great need for women to be supported on a deeper level, not only through pregnancy and birth but especially during the Postpartum shift. She made it her mission to show up for other women as the kind of loving support that she wished she’d had.

Becoming a Postpartum doula has led her to her truest passion- supporting women as they make their transition into Motherhood. To assist women as they empower themselves and activate their own healing.

McLean views the journey of conception through to postpartum as different points on one continuum. It is this holistic approach that helps women embrace all the parts of their journey with clear vision, strength and grace. She thanks her highest gurus- her daughters Jemima and Goldy Wolf for leading her onto this path and helping her find her true Self. It takes a village to raise a mother, not just a child.